Wednesday, June 9, 2010
Friday, June 4, 2010
Gracie Girl
It's about to be my Gracie's 4th birthday!!! Four years have passed since this sweet child graced our lives. When we decided to have another baby, little did we know what God had in store for us!
I became pregnant pretty quickly and we were all so excited about it. But that baby is not the baby we later would come to know. This one went to be with Jesus too soon. My fears grew as to how I would ever be able to love another baby as much as a mama should. But God knows. We all grieved for a long time and still grieve. But God gives grace and life goes on, and I became pregnant again and this time God blessed us with Grace. Not only did he bless us with a beautiful baby girl, but He blessed us with the GRACE that is His Gospel. I knew within hours of finding out she was a girl what her name was going to be.
Backing up a bit....the year that I miscarried was a tragic one. Not only for me, but for the entire O'Halloran family. Soon after I lost our precious gift, my nephew lost his mama. There was so much grief and fear. But it is through these kind of trials that God appears with grace. I learned more that year than I ever thought I could. So much deep in my heart, I still can't seem to find words to express. So forgive me if I sound vague. One of the things God showed me was that in this life, what we deserve is death, sadness, tragedy....sin is the source of this truth. But, even through these things, as God's children, He does not allow these things to take us. Even on the death bed, God can reach to the very soul and call that child home. Sin caused death, but God's grace says, "No...this one is mine." That is GRACE. Even through the tragedy of losing a precious child, God's grace says, "It's ok...I have big plans for you. This one is mine." His will always wins out over our sin and our choices. That is GRACE. He is God, not us! Not our choices, not our sin. HE IS. This is Grace. So when I realized that because of my absolute depravity, that I didn't even deserve the joy that a mama feels with her children....yet HIS GRACE says, "You are mine! Here is my gift to you." And Grace came into our lives.
She has blessed me as a mama in ways I can't put into words. When I look at her I am reminded of the precious gift of His grace in my life. I now understand the Gospel. I now understand what it means to be His child and there is freedom. This precious girl has been a part of a journey for me. God's grace reached to me when I was still dead in my sin and called me to life. I could not have chosen this for myself, He did it for me. Thanks be to God for His grace!
Happy Birthday Gracie Girl.....we love you!
Monday, May 24, 2010
To clarify....
I think a lot of people are reading my latest post and thinking I am saying something I never intended to say! So...to clarify...I believe that the beauty of our salvation is the fact that God has opened our eyes to see our ugliness and sin and that He has called us out of death to life! We are all ugly...this is the Gospel. We are all in need of rescuing and God did exactly that. He rescued His children out of our ugliness. In this I rest and rejoice...that God can take the ugly parts of who I am and turn them into something beautiful for His glory. In no way was trying to be self-loathing! But, I will say this....without His grace....where would be?
Life:1000 Gifts
I have been thinking about why I haven't posted much these days, and the only answer I could come up with, the painfully honest answer, I am too ugly inside to post things beautiful. I love to write about beautiful things; things of God and family and life, and lately I have not been feeling the way I think I need to feel in order to write. Maybe I am a little melodramatic, which of course I have been told I am, but as I have pondered this over the last week, this is the ugly truth. I am ugly inside. My constant failures and constant disdain for disorder and chaos make my mouth and heart ugly. And my ever faithful and constant God has reminded me that this alone is the reason I needed a rescue. Gracie and I have been reading The Jesus Storybook Bible lately. This children's Bible storybook has brought these adult eyes to tears on a nightly basis. Beautifully written, it recounts the entire Bible and brings the central message of the entire Bible, that of a needed rescue, to life. In the story of Adam and Eve, the beginning of our ugliness, Sally Lloyd-Jones says it like this, " But before they left the garden, God make clothes for his children, to cover them. He gently clothed them and then sent them away on a long, long journey-out of the garden, out of their home. Well, in another story, it would all be over and that would have been....THE END. But not in this story. God loved his children too much to let the story end there. Even though he knew he would suffer, God had a plan-a magnificent dream. One day, he would get his children back. One day, he would make their perfect home again. And one day, he would wipe away every tear from their eyes. You see, no matter what, in spite of everything, God would love his children--with a Never Stopping, Never Giving Up, Unbreaking, Always and Forever Love. And though they would forget him, and run from him, deep in their hearts, God's children would miss him always, and long for him-lost children yearning for their home. Before they left the garden, God whispered a promise to Adam and Eve: "It will not always be so! I will come to rescue you! And when I do, I'm going to do battle against the snake. I'll get rid of the sin and the dark and the sadness you let in here. I'm coming back for you!" And he would. One day, God himself would come."
I thank God on this Monday, for rescuing me. He has already won my battles and all I have to do is rest in his grace. His grace, his grace envelopes me today and his grace is what takes the ugly and makes it beautiful, and I am thankful....my list goes on....
0071-finding his treasures of a home left behind
0072-still desiring to learn long after our homeschooling adventure ends
0073-little hands working on her letter book
0074-little fingers
0075-getting pictures of my nephew and his loves
0076-my brave boy
0077-small casts filled with names of those who care
0078-the constant sunshine and get well balloons
0079-a daughter who loves and cares for her brother0080-a husband home safely
0081-new friends to lean on when crisis falls (thank you Frazer family!)
0082-the love of family felt through the phone lines
0083-last week of school
0084-my Jesus, whose death on the cross provided us with the greatest rescue my heart could ever hope for.
0085-and His grace that carries us through this life of pain and ugliness
0086-the hope that one day, all things will be made beautiful
My list will go on despite the ugly....this is the beauty of a life secure in His grace.
Monday, May 17, 2010
Mother's Day & More:1000 Gifts
As this May rolls on, my heart is full. I have many things to be thankful for. The one that comes to mind is fresh. I have just returned from one of the best gifts I could have asked for this Mother's Day. My husband and kids gave me a night away at a local Hyatt resort. Who could ask for a better gift than time to be pampered and be refreshed. I spent my time walking, reading, walking, more reading, reflecting and being thankful for all that my sweet Lord has blessed me with...His precious Son who rescued me and called me His own. My heart is indeed full and my gratitude list continues....
0062-This man
0063-Picture perfect day to walk and reflect
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
Happy Easter 2010!!!
Our first Easter in New Mexico....it started with a little bit of stress! Isn't it always that way on the way to church? One of those things, I think as believers, we will always struggle with. To press through and get to church , or give in to the stress of the morning and stay home?! We made it and thank God we did. Our day did not turn out so bad after all! As I look back on the pictures of our Easter weekend, what I had initially thought of as a stressful, hard time was really a wonderful weekend with my family and some very dear friends. God is good! He is faithful even amongst the stress of our days. Here is a little look.....
Dying Easter eggs....
Easter Baskets....
Can the hair get any crazier!!!!
Gracie's pretty new dress....Kathryn was not so cooperative that morning!! But, hers was pretty too!!
After dinner with the Hooks....lots of Wii!!!
And some other craziness!!
The Gospel is alive and well!! In spite of the sin and suffering that fills our day, His joy makes us complete in Him! Thanks be to God. He is risen!!Wednesday, March 31, 2010
How Beautiful: The Great Adventure Continues
"How then will they call on Him in whom they have not believed? And how are they to believe in Him of whom they have never heard? And how are they to hear without someone preaching? And how are they to preach unless they are sent? As it is written, 'How beautiful are the feet of those who preach the good news'!" ~Romans 10:14,15
It has been almost one year since this adventure started...officially. There have been many other times we have stepped out in faith to see if God wanted us to move. Our philosophy has always been to walk as if God is in it, and let Him keep the door open, or close it. At least three times, He closed the door. Until this time. Last April, we put our house on the market and set our minds on the future. Every door has been wide open. God has been faithful at every turn...even to the smallest detail. I have sat back and watched in amazement as God has walked our little family through a very trying journey. At times, you can almost feel the cosmic battle being fought around us. It has been palpable. But, our God is faithful to fight the battle. He has the victory, and we stand in it. I thank God that He has ordained all our steps.
Since we have been here, Michael has begun school and God is honoring His faithful study. We have also had to pray through where he would work during this time. At the beginning, there was a church in need of help. We walked through that door, and God closed it. We moved on and God proved faithful again. This time, working with one of our dearest friends.
Mark 16:15 says, "And He said to them, 'Go into all the world and proclaim the gospel to the whole creation.'" This of course, is Jesus talking to His disciples before He left this earth. It was his commission then, and it is ours now. This is the mission statement behind Sixteen:fifteen, the non-profit organization Michael is now working for. Missions is what brought Michael and I together, and it remains one of the cries of our hearts...to see this Gospel brought to the world. To see God's children brought into the fold and experience His grace. Sixteen:fifteen's mission is to come along side churches to see the great commission fulfilled. They work to find unreached people groups for churches to "adopt" and begin setting out to fulfill the great commission. Already, since Michael has been on board, we have seen a local church work to set out to Kenya and to Mexico and build a 10 year plan on reaching two people groups who have yet to hear the Gospel. This is just one example of many, many churches living out the call of Christ. Michael has already traveled with this church to Mexico and seen God's hand at work. Not only is God at work in Mexico, but in my husband's heart as well. When he returned from that trip, I knew this is where God has called him to be at this time. It was written all over his face. He was alive with the Gospel. He may have the opportunity to travel to Kenya as well and I thank God for His timing in all things.As many of you know, working for a small non-profit presents challenges. Because Michael's job description is administrative in nature, he does not have to raise all his funds, but does have to bring in a significant amount of his salary. This was something we prayed through in earnest. Was this what God was calling us to do? We have supported many friends and ministries over the years and understood what they went through to live by faith just the way we were now being faced with. Yet, God did not seem to be closing this door. It remained wide open, so we have walked through. We now ask for your prayer in this endeavor. We know that God has been with us in every step of this great adventure and will continue to provide our needs. In this, we are confident. We will continue to faithfully walk out this great adventure with faith and with the grace so freely given.
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