One Year Later:1000 Gifts

It's been one year already! I can't tell you how fast this year went. I am sitting at my desk staring out my window to an absolutely gorgeous view on a gorgeous New Mexico fall day. I am truly blessed. We have suffered many emotions over the past few weeks. The year anniversary of our little adventure brought joy, fear, tears, gratitude, questions. One thing we believe so strongly is that God is sovereign. HE has ordained our days, HE has ordained our steps, HE has ordained our decisions. As my husband faithfully goes about his days, many questions rear their ugly heads. But we know God is walking with us, He is sustaining us and teaching us how to live this new life. Our children are growing. I am growing and learning how to navigate my sometimes difficult melancholy self!!! One thing I am so grateful for is God's ever present hand on me reminding me that I am His chosen girl. One who He loves and disciplines. I am learning to laugh more often and smile more often, and believe me....I need to do these things more. He has blessed me and cherished me. Our tears are turning to joy....

So, with a full heart, one that is learning how to serve, my gratitude list goes on....

0087: a God that ordains my steps

0088: pain that reminds me always of a God who upholds

0089: a letter from Gracie girl--"You are the greatest mama. You are the greatest mom." (Singing this of course-it goes on to thank God) "Thank you for the E I made. Thank you for Knoxy. Thank you God for everything."

0090: learning to not let life slip away

0091: learning to let go

0092: my home

0093: the turning leaves

0094: the quiet

Lord, help me to be more tender, joy-filled, gracious....

Summer:Time Flies

Wow! This has been quite a year....it's been a year since we have moved, and it's very hard for my mind to believe it. It went so fast! Life is moving along at a pace I find hard to keep up with. But, it has been a year of many blessings. One of those blessings is finally being able to "get away" with my family and have to rely so much on just them, that my focus is clear once again on the priorities that are important. With my mind and heart clear, I have seen so many things that I wish I could change. Michael and have talked so much about this lately. And I thank God that my children are still young enough to witness the changes in our hearts as we grow closer to our Savior. This is one of the reasons we moved. Realizing that time is fleeting; are we living out the dream God has put in our hearts? Are we going to let more time go by before we "make the most of every opportunity"? As fast as time is moving, I can't even fathom the fact that my kids will sooner, rather than later, be leaving our home to follow their dreams. I want to live my life as an example of what it means to live in the presence of God and in the will of God. I want my kids to look back and see God's hand of blessing on our family. This summer is a testament to that blessing. A new home, a new dog, a most wonderful time away with family and friends. My children were so blessed this summer by so many people. Michael and I were blessed also. Blessed with time alone with each other to make a new home for our kids, and to just BE together. I am so grateful. I look forward to the next year of this adventure with eyes wide open and a heart that wants to witness every moment with my family and my God. I don't want to miss a thing!

(These pictures are way out of order....but, enjoy! Many good memories contained in them!)

The power of grace

The pastor of the church we have been attending posted this excerpt from author Elyse Fitzpatrick. It was so good, I had to share it....

Because of the incarnation, Jesus Christ knows exactly what it is to live in a sin-cursed world with people who break the rules…like me. I am a rule-breaker but He’s loved me and he’s experienced every trial I face. He’s with me. He sympathizes with my weakness (Hebrews 4:15). This understanding of His love in the face of my sin drains my anger at my rule-breaking neighbor. I can love her because I’ve been loved and I am just like her.

Because of His sinless life, I now have a perfect record of loving my neighbor. He perfectly loved rule-breakers. This record of perfect love for my rule-breaking neighbor is mine now; knowing this relieves my guilt. Even though I continue to fail to love, His record is mine.

Because of His substitutionary death, I am completely forgiven for my sin…even the sins that I seem to fall into at the slightest provocation. God has no wrath left for me because He poured it all out on His Son. He’s not disappointed or irritated. He welcomes me as a beloved daughter.

Because of His resurrection (and the justification it brings), I know that the power of sin in my life has been broken. Yes, I’ve failed again, but I can have the courage to continue to fight sin because I’m no longer a slave to it. This replaces despair with faith to wage war against my selfishness and pride.

Because of His ascension and reign, I know that this situation isn’t a mere chance happening. He’s orchestrated it so that I will remember Him and be blessed by the gospel again. He’s ruling over my life and interceding for me right now. I’m not a slave to chaos or chance. He’s my Sovereign King and I can rest in His loving plan today and rejoice in Him.

And, because of His promised return, I know that all the doubt, injustice and struggle will one day come to an end. This line in this grocery store and my plans for dinner isn’t all there is. There’s the great good news of the gospel. I can go home now and share with my family and guests how Jesus met me at the grocery store and we can rejoice together in His work on our behalf.

~Elyse Fitzpatrick

Gracie's First Real Hair Cut

My girl getting her first "real" hair cut! She was so excited!!

The Birthday Party

A few snapshots of my girl's 4th birthday....

Gracie Girl

It's about to be my Gracie's 4th birthday!!! Four years have passed since this sweet child graced our lives. When we decided to have another baby, little did we know what God had in store for us!

I became pregnant pretty quickly and we were all so excited about it. But that baby is not the baby we later would come to know. This one went to be with Jesus too soon. My fears grew as to how I would ever be able to love another baby as much as a mama should. But God knows. We all grieved for a long time and still grieve. But God gives grace and life goes on, and I became pregnant again and this time God blessed us with Grace. Not only did he bless us with a beautiful baby girl, but He blessed us with the GRACE that is His Gospel. I knew within hours of finding out she was a girl what her name was going to be.

Backing up a bit....the year that I miscarried was a tragic one. Not only for me, but for the entire O'Halloran family. Soon after I lost our precious gift, my nephew lost his mama. There was so much grief and fear. But it is through these kind of trials that God appears with grace. I learned more that year than I ever thought I could. So much deep in my heart, I still can't seem to find words to express. So forgive me if I sound vague. One of the things God showed me was that in this life, what we deserve is death, sadness, tragedy....sin is the source of this truth. But, even through these things, as God's children, He does not allow these things to take us. Even on the death bed, God can reach to the very soul and call that child home. Sin caused death, but God's grace says, "No...this one is mine." That is GRACE. Even through the tragedy of losing a precious child, God's grace says, "It's ok...I have big plans for you. This one is mine." His will always wins out over our sin and our choices. That is GRACE. He is God, not us! Not our choices, not our sin. HE IS. This is Grace. So when I realized that because of my absolute depravity, that I didn't even deserve the joy that a mama feels with her children....yet HIS GRACE says, "You are mine! Here is my gift to you." And Grace came into our lives.

She has blessed me as a mama in ways I can't put into words. When I look at her I am reminded of the precious gift of His grace in my life. I now understand the Gospel. I now understand what it means to be His child and there is freedom. This precious girl has been a part of a journey for me. God's grace reached to me when I was still dead in my sin and called me to life. I could not have chosen this for myself, He did it for me. Thanks be to God for His grace!

Happy Birthday Gracie Girl.....we love you!